Birth Certificates

My oldest kids are 2 years and 8 months old, and until today I didn't have a birth certificate for any of my kids. Apparently at some hospitals the paperwork is done so that the birth certificate is automatically mailed sometime after the baby is born. I guess that doesn't happen at my hospital. I did go home with paperwork telling me how to get the birth certificates, but I just never did. I had put it off for so long that I was actually worried that I may have missed the window to get the birth certificate.

When we were growing up, my mother treated our birth certificates like they might spontaneously combust at any minute. I don't remember ever being allowed to actually touch mine. I think she whispered "birth certificate" when she referred to them. And she was constantly inferring that really bad things would happen if we ever lost our birth certificates. I'm sure that my mom still has my birth certificate put up in some place very safe and that, most likely, no one but my mom has actually touched them.

So, you can imagine my surprise when I learned that you can just go down to the county health department and get a birth certificate. I assumed that this must be some inferior copy of a birth certificate and perhaps not something that was accepted for schools and other important things where birth certificates were required. So, I called down to the state vital records department and made a few inquiries. After cross-examining the lady on the phone and determining that one may indeed get as many original certified copies of a birth certificate as one wants to pay for, which are not copies or inferior, I finally just asked her why my mom always acted like it would be the end of the world if we lost ours. She laughed and said she didn't know but her mom was the same way.

So this afternoon I made the trip to the county health department to pick up the kids' birth certificates. To my surprise, I was in and out in about 15 minutes. It was overall a really pleasant experience.

I was a little surprised at the wave of emotions that rolled over me as I stood there holding my four kids' birth certificates. It felt official. It was as if I can really say now that I have four kids and that they are actually mine, because now I am a mom with birth certificates. I still haven't decided whether I will let them touch them or not, or if I'll brainwash them into thinking that very bad things, whatever those things may be, will happen if they lose their birth certificates. Or maybe I can wait until one day when my mom comes over and let the kids loose with their birth certificates, which would inevitably end up destroyed. That may be too much for my mom to handle, but it'd be pretty funny to watch.